Showing posts with label strength. Show all posts
Showing posts with label strength. Show all posts

“If you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is compromise.”


My PDC just sent this to me. It is absolutely essential to where I am at right now. I took a few hours off of writing to be a mom and before getting back to writing tonight, wanted to re-post this (for those keeping track, I'm at 150pgs). Just remember how important and powerful choice is. It can affect love, disdain, everything. Much like "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind", it is possible to erase a memory or at least change your emotional reaction to a situation or a trauma. I am going the Spotless Mind route: light therapy to erase, or rather shift, a recent relationship in order to move forward. One valuable lesson I'm learning is to be very careful who you befriend or allow in your life. When you're on the road to success, people will come in and try to knock you off course. Be stronger than that, stronger than them. In the end the real friends, the really valuable people in your life will be there and when you can't always spend time together, it never changes the core of your relationship. Real is real. Period. 

While this post is more Eastern Philosophy, it applies to success, to people, to art. All of my artist friends know exactly what this means. It seems in order to be a real artist, one must endure a tremendous amount of suffering. I always remember the torment Einstein endured. The fact that Walt Disney was fired twice for "lacking creativity and imagination". People, the people who cannot fathom you will do exactly what you dream, will try and tear you down and tell you "you can't". Who cares what they say! They are miserable, unhappy people who tear you down because they 1)lack imagination, 2) are too self-absorbed to imagine you'll do what they can never achieve, 3) live in a gossip, insane bubble that allows them to "try" and judge you, put you down because they clearly haven't the gull or intellect or will to do what you are doing. Nay-sayers exist for the sole purpose to prove them wrong. They are not the exception. YOU ARE. Artists, you know who you are, remember the things others have endured and you will know you are on the right path. The more people tell you, "you can't" the more you should know, "you will".  Jealousy rears its head at every turn. Mediocrity is not the artist's "M.O." - determination, endurance, and the mere knowledge that they will - and can - achieve something miraculous is why we do what we do in the first place.


1. Life means suffering.
To live means to suffer, because the human nature is not perfect and neither is the world we live in. During our lifetime, we inevitably have to endure physical suffering such as pain, sickness, injury, tiredness, old age, and eventually death; and we have to endure psychological suffering like sadness, fear, frustration, disappointment, and depression. Although there are different degrees of suffering and there are also positive experiences in life that we perceive as the opposite of suffering, such as ease, comfort and happiness, life in its totality is imperfect and incomplete, because our world is subject to impermanence. This means we are never able to keep permanently what we strive for, and just as happy moments pass by, we ourselves and our loved ones will pass away one day, too.

2. The origin of suffering is attachment.
The origin of suffering is attachment to transient things and the ignorance thereof. Transient things do not only include the physical objects that surround us, but also ideas, and -in a greater sense- all objects of our perception. Ignorance is the lack of understanding of how our mind is attached to impermanent things. The reasons for suffering are desire, passion, ardour, pursuit of wealth and prestige, striving for fame and popularity, or in short: craving and clinging. Because the objects of our attachment are transient, their loss is inevitable, thus suffering will necessarily follow. Objects of attachment also include the idea of a "self" which is a delusion, because there is no abiding self. What we call "self" is just an imagined entity, and we are merely a part of the ceaseless becoming of the universe.

3. The cessation of suffering is attainable.
The cessation of suffering can be attained through nirodha. Nirodha means the unmaking of sensual craving and conceptual attachment. The third noble truth expresses the idea that suffering can be ended by attaining dispassion. Nirodha extinguishes all forms of clinging and attachment. This means that suffering can be overcome through human activity, simply by removing the cause of suffering. Attaining and perfecting dispassion is a process of many levels that ultimately results in the state of Nirvana. Nirvana means freedom from all worries, troubles, complexes, fabrications and ideas. Nirvana is not comprehensible for those who have not attained it.

4. The path to the cessation of suffering.
There is a path to the end of suffering - a gradual path of self-improvement, which is described more detailed in the Eightfold Path. It is the middle way between the two extremes of excessive self-indulgence (hedonism) and excessive self-mortification (asceticism); and it leads to the end of the cycle of rebirth. The latter quality discerns it from other paths which are merely "wandering on the wheel of becoming", because these do not have a final object. The path to the end of suffering can extend over many lifetimes, throughout which every individual rebirth is subject to karmic conditioning. Craving, ignorance, delusions, and its effects will disappear gradually, as progress is made on the path.

For more on this: http://www.thebigview.com/buddhism/fourtruths.html

Read more!

You know that feeling when you open your eyes and you think, "ahh, that's done. I'm finally done" and it turns out, that's true! After my blog last night I feel like I let go of that last gnawing piece of the past. I felt relieved and really, it's finally over. My heart is starting to mend itself. I'm taking all of the steps necessary to keep my focus on the people and things in my life that actually mean something and thankfully, that's a pretty extensive list. 

I even managed to go to the beach for a quick run this morning. The air was so brisk and I could feel the moisture of the sea gently caressing my face. I ran and the tide was really high and the water just saturated my feet and it felt like heaven. It felt like all of the pain I was hanging onto was being removed from me one tide at a time and god it felt good. Sometimes you realize you're stronger than you think. I made it through this last breakup a hell of a lot faster than I had the times before. Why? Because this entire year of the "yo-yo effect" prepared me to fully walk away and I can say that today - I walked away. The good news is, my head and heart will never let me look back. Life is pretty extraordinary that way. Something I learned about myself yesterday is when I am forced to survive, I will, and I'm very resourceful in getting there quickly. I have more inner strength than I give myself credit for and no matter what, every single experience teaches me more about myself, the truly exquisite people and friends in my life, and it teaches AND reminds me that I am pretty damn lucky. 

So that's it. Surely I will reference it once in a while and my blogs aren't going to be cheery and uppity all the time because that's not life. That's not even close to life. But I will keep baring my soul to you and I will continually thank you for being gracious enough to accept me.

So now I begin a new chapter of my life. I call it vintage thinking. Why? Because the "old days" of taking the time to know someone, taking the time to spend with your friends and ones you loved was of value. I'm stripping away this modern notion that I have to be out there dating, being cool, being politically correct, or whatever. Total waste of my time to be honest. I dated and had a LOT of fun before I got married. No regrets. I know what it is I want and so now, I will love the beautiful mess I am and I am going to get back to the only things that really matter. I am going to be the woman with confidence and poise and style and a heart bigger than this universe and if you don't want to be a part of it, by all means, move on. If you do, then LET'S DO THIS!


I am getting ready to strip down to my basics, enjoy this new coppery red hair, put on a shade of red lipstick and remember that I am a woman that is beautiful and strong and smart and to hell with anyone who tries to stifle that!

For a Mr. Jones:

Read more!

(I initially got this quote wrong in the live version - chalk it up to exhaustion...)

It takes a lot of strength to love but there is a quote I believe is the only way it can work: "If you can't love me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe.


When it's real, you never run away. You never walk away. You never turn your back. You stay and that is often the hardest thing to do. You see, when you have a good heart and when you're real, when you're actually legit, you don't listen to the ones who don't know. So anyway, here's VideoBlog #3 Parts 1 and 2 (and for comments, please email me at info@dawngarcia.com):

Part1:

Part 2:



Read more!

I listened to this song "Jar of Hearts" and then "Love the Way you Lie" and I can feel that my heart is in such a strange place these days. On the fence of my future and the hurt from a recent past. I know we all make mistakes - we all get hurt but you can't be careless with someone's heart. Once that happens, we lose a part of ourselves. You hurt someone and you break off a piece of yourself. People have been careless with my heart and I hurt. I may have been careless with others' hearts and for that, god my insides ache. I am so sorry. My heart is healing from the painstaking truths of the past. I cry and I am defensive and I worry about so many things. Not always romantic hurt, sometimes just that kind of hurt that is so deep - family, "friends", careers ... Every relationship we have should be treated with delicacy and care. We can't just walk around disposing of one another like the well is so full of options. You can beat someone down with words or neglect. You don't have to physically ever pick up your hand --- sometimes the damage you leave behind by not loving someone the way they should be loved is worse. The scars cut so deep that the heart physically bleeds from the weathered storm and the shards of misunderstanding. I can't fathom not being hurt or having loss because it opens up my heart almost as much as it forces me to protect myself. I am who I am. I am good and I am strong and I never deserved the harsh hand of haste. And now, sunshine and beauty is in front of me and I cower. I find so much fear paralyzing me and all I have to say is the heart has to heal. No one can break me again. No one can lie to me again. No one can take away that beautiful trust and hope I have running through my veins like oxygen. I want to figure it all out but my heart - the actual heart - it swells with possibility and weighing it down with regret and sadness only forces it to lose its purpose.



I know we're all a little lost these days. It seems perfection is within reach, always something better or more beautiful but your eyes have to be open. You can't expect perfection if you aren't perfect yourself. You have to evaluate your mistakes to find life again. We all do. Last night I got to this point - this pivotal moment where emotion came over me. Anger. Hurt. Fear. I was horrified at the things I'd experienced, the death I've seen, the sickness I've seen engulf those I love. I've seen murder and pain and injustice. I have been held and loved and then thrown into a hypothetical fire of disdain and neglect BUT --- I have been given all of that because somehow life, the Universe, god, whatever - thought I had to. Because I am strong and it won't break me. It won't take away my value and it will propel me forward. Thrust me into goodness and success and life and love because that's the only place I know to seek refuge. I have seen ugly. I have seen abuse. I have seen neglect. I have seen heartache. I do not respond in kind. I respond with strength and hope. Do not be careless with each other, people. Do not see "Strange" when its beauty standing before you. Do not close your arms when all that's needed is the simple warmth of your embrace. Do not ignore art - it is saying something. Do not ignore the simple gesture of your children because one day that will be all you think of to get you through a rough day. We have everything at our disposal. People shouldn't be one of those. 

I have seen it happen. I have been on the receiving end. I have been totally looked past and that is hollowing. It takes parts of you away - lost in the galaxy somewhere waiting to be claimed. I see my guy friends dating. Going through women like it's a new pair of shoes. I see my girlfriends going out with guys. Playing stupid games and giving every bit of themselves away. We're all afraid. We're all afraid to be alone but isn't it worse to be ignored? To be misused and mistreated or worse, be the one mistreating or neglecting or being cruel. Don't think for a second karma isn't going to find you. Somehow, someway the hurt and pain and carelessness you inflict - it's going to cost you something extraordinary. Don't let it. Don't be that person. Please stop collecting jars of hearts...

(Scroll all the way down for a video of "Love the Way you Lie" performed by two incredibly talented kids...)


No I can't take one more step towards you
Cause all that's waiting is regret
And don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore
You lost the love I loved the most

I learned to live half alive

And now you want me one more time

And who do you think you are

Running around leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are

I hear you're asking all around

If I am anywhere to be found
But I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms

I learned to live half alive

And now you want me one more time

And who do you think you are

Running around leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are

And it took so long just to feel alright

Remember how to put back the light in my eyes
I wish I would have missed the first time that we kissed
Cause you broke all your promises
And now you're back
You don't get to get me back

And who do you think you are

Running around leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all

And who do you think you are

Running around leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all

Who do you think you are

Who do you think you are
Who do you think you are


 


Please go find the lyrics to this song. Here is a link for now:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z72c3F2td5E
Read more!

Subscribe